????????
Now I wait here till the night becomes at its end
wandering... waiting in my mind the desires that could never be fullfilled
a day or two maybe one more later was supposed to have a joyess send
until i come to realization that the expected will just be spilled
pouring and draining out of me the will i sought to overcome
it begins to take over me with a force as always unseen
lying down in my own pitful hopes of this filthy slum
these are the days that i shouldve forseen
wanting... needing only for my selfish likings i feel it be
leaving my heart vunerable with expectations that will never be true
why cant i just accept it and begin to finally see
that deep down inside or even subcontiously i mean nothing to you
for why would these times occur ever so often in my life
over and over the promises are meant to be broken
i know this yet i lure myself into my own trap of strife
so maybe i should just sit still and from here on never spoken
giving up is always the easy way out but is it right for me too
now as always it seems there can be no other way
hope and chance i shall not leave though i dont know if it will come new
considering it hasnt from then, nor now, most likely not any day
ill give one more chance as i always do
wondering... waiting... for maybe that one day
when change is at hand so i may once more believe in you
and life will be what it once was and for this i pray